"If I had 10 million dollars, I would buy a villa.
Do I have 10 million dollars?
No.
So I still haven’t got a villa.
…
If the fire of loving you couldn’t be put out even I poured all the water in the Pacific Ocean out.
Can I pour all the water in Pacific Ocean out?
No.
So I still don’t love you."
This is from a once-famous internet novel called the first intimate contact. A man and a woman got to know each other because of this stupid poem above. They then fell in love with each other but didn’t speak out. The ending is pathetic that the woman got a very serious disease and died. The most moving part was that the last moment before she had died, she wrote another paragraph:
“If the fire of loving you couldn’t be put out even I poured all the water in the bathtub out.
Can I pour all the water in a bathtub out?
Yes.
So, I love you.”
When I was at Edison’s age, a person who was very important to me recommended it to me. I still remember that I have caught a cold that day, but kept on reading it late in the night.
Now I feel regretted to have returned the book to him. After I burned all the dairies I wrote about him, the novel seems to be the only substantive memory about him. Of course, I have considered buying another one. But another one has no meaning to me.
He has been buried deeply in my mind until the phrase “seize the day” in the movie reminded me again. Before I decided to forget it, I thought about it not less than one hundred times that maybe if either of us seized the chance rather than waiting, we’d been in the same university and I wouldn’t even been here, Harbin or Singapore. Unfortunately, fairy tales didn’t come down upon me.
If...
Given a time capsule, I would travel to tens of millions of years ago to find out whether we descent from apes for terrestrial.
Given a time capsule, I would travel to feudal China to find out why women were forced to band their feet for Mrs Yap.
Given a time capsule, I would like to travel to last year to find out what life would be like if I seized the chance for myself…
Saturday, April 10, 2010
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Even if no "if" exists, even if no time capsule is available, even if we have many regrets but no change can be done to the past, the present is concrete and there are plenty of possibilities within reach. The past has passed but the future hasn't. Come on!
ReplyDeleteI always feel carefree just because I seldom feel regretable after I make a decision, no matter I am wrong or not. There is no time capsule and the only thing we can do is to control over mood and seize theday~.
ReplyDeleteI was deeply impressed by your blog, especially the these sentences leaded by "if". However, we cannot change the fact which has been locked in history. So what we should do is to cherish everyone who accompanies us and not to leave regrets in life.
ReplyDeleteI am a person who believed "IF" before. However, now i don not believe it any more. I experienced many no if things. I had a deep thought about it. I think you should make preparations for the cases that if won't happen.
ReplyDeleteElain you SHOULD find out why women bound their feet and write a blog on it. I know all your classmates are interested to know. IF suggests to me a supposition, sometimes of regret over a past event which you had not acted on, when you had the chance. This could be because we are afraid of the results, we are not sure of our desires. We should weigh the pros and cons and the results and consequences of each action, then take the action and work on it to make is succeed.
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